Monday, August 23, 2010

The Rise & Fall...Fame

Sept 25, 1979

I went to Hurrah's because they were having this whole list of bands to salute NYC. What a shitty place to go. The 2 really big names cancelled. Debby Harry & Chris Stein were there. I spoke to Debby for alittle while. She has turned into such a snob. I guess that's what fame does to you but she was so stuck up. I just have looked at her a few times and I didn't even know it was her. Chris Stein looked really different too. Worse I think. I will never understand why she is with him. Debbie looked really good though. We went to Max's after but it was dead. Then we went to this diner in the Village that mostly gay people go to. Miki Zone was there. Maybe he's gay.


Thursday, August 19, 2010

An Unedited Page

For Nicole....

So truth be told, I do slight editing to my diary at times for 2 reasons. The first is I do not want to incriminate others for their past drug use and the other is probably complete embarrassment of how silly I actually sounded at times. But this was 30 years ago, the mind of an obsessed 21 year old. So I have decided not to edit going forward and to post a completely unedited day that I just skipped.

And by the way – the original title of diary was called Hail True Love (loved a shirt that Walter Lure used to wear with it written on it) but as my infatuation with the Blessed grew, I changed the name to “My journal: or How I fell in love with Howie Pyro: A day by day account.”

So it has been fun to reconnect with Billy & Howie originally on myspace & now on facebook and to see none of us ever really grow up :)

Sept 22nd, 1979

I did not go into NYC last night and it took so much willpower not to go. I know if I want to Max's I would see Billy but I honestly could not face him. I've been so depressed about him. He has changed to much and I am going to avoid seeing Billy now and I will not call or write him for as long as I can hold out. I can't say I will never call him again as I am only human. I just hope I have to self will in my not to call him. He just repulses me now the same way Howie did when I stopped liking him. I am going to be looking for a job tomorrow. So I will start getting my life in order for me. Tonight the Ramones are playing and so is Johnny Thunders and I doubt I will go to either.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Reedited Version - Change of Plans

Sept 23rd, 1979

Reedited to include the entire page and not the edited version.

I called up Billy for a change. I must be nuts or something. So I told him there was a chance I would be going to Max's so to go and I would give him the movie films if I was there. Well I was all ready to go to the Ramones and all of a sudden I just had to go to Max's instead. I saw Billy there. I saw The Heat and the 2 Timers. I offered Billy a ride home after but he said he was not going home. I have this horrible feeling that he left with some sleezy waitress. I am actually going insane over Billy. I feel he has turned my life upside down. Well I will try not to call him this week but obviously my word is not good. I know I won't be writing Billy anymore letters since he does not appreciate them. Over all, the night was kind of borning. Not too much going on. I should have gone to the Ramones. It was have been such a better night.

Monday, August 9, 2010

A Wasted Night

Sept 20th, 1979

I went into NYC with Mary Ann. She wanted to see Howie but he was not working. So we called Billy so I could try to get my movies back. He got my letter. I am kind of depressed about the whole situation. We met up with Jeff Miller and I think he is selling Billy drugs. I can't believe this is what is going to become of Billy. I have this feeling that the next Blessed show is really going to suck. I don't know if I even like them anymore. I am just so repulsed by this new drug habit. After we went over the Eileen's. She quit being the Blessed Manager and I don't blame her. Hopefully Billy will straighten himself out.